It’s Not About Motivation

Even though I grew up at the base of one of the world’s premier ski resorts in the Colorado Rockies, I didn’t put on a pair of skis until I was 15. By the time I reached high school, most of my friends were champion skiers. Embarrassed by my lack of skill, I decided I needed to learn, too. Besides, how hard could it be? We were the same age, and if they could do it, I could do it, too. I signed up for the next ski trip offered by my church youth group, and they paired me with a ski aficionado teenager. I was motivated to learn, and I now had someone to show me how it’s done. 

As the ski lifts opened that morning, my friend showed me how to hop on the first lift, and up we went! As we climbed higher, I started to worry a bit, but I figured we were the same age, so I figured I’d be fine. Long behind us now were the toddlers in snowsuits ambling down the Bunny Hill. As we climbed, we passed symbols of varying colours and shapes, none of which I knew the meaning. Finally, we passed two side-by-side black diamonds, and we jumped off. 

Her long blond hair flashed in the wind as the powdered snow whipped passed her hot-pink snow jacket and whooshed into my face. Once I spat out the snow and wiped off my goggles, she was nowhere in sight. Gobsmacked, I peered down the cliff and wondered how the heck I was going to get to the bottom of this mountain. I’ll skip the details, but suffice it to say, it took a rescue crew to find me after dark. 

I learned a painful but not-so-obvious lesson: Motivation can only get you so far. 

What I needed were time and a skilled mentor. Likewise, students with learning differences need the same. They need time for their brains to construct meaning and develop new neurological pathways, and they need a skilled mentor to take them on that pathway step by step. 

How often do we hear adults tell teens that they would learn if they were just motivated enough? Worse yet, they would get better grades if they weren’t so lazy? After all, teens their age can do it, so why can’t they? Sadly, these statements create significant psychological damage and, ironically, decimate their motivation. 

When the rescue crew found me and delivered me to my youth group that night, I was greeted with hugs, hot chocolate, and even an apology. I felt very loved and very relieved beyond measure. Even so, it’s been over three decades now, and have I learned to ski? Nope. I left my motivation back at the top of that mountain, frozen in time and space, ever waiting for a skilled ski instructor to come and thaw it out.

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